The war against bad grammar
Whilst walking through Victoria station this week, I came upon a splendid example of linguistic direct action. As someone who believes the pen mightier than the sword, I was delighted to witness the frontline of the fewer / less grammar debate.
There I am at rush hour when out of the corner of my eye I spot a notice. It read: London Underground cares about the environment. That’s why at quieter times, we run less escalators. With glee I then clock a grammar guerrilla had taken the time to correct the text. The delight went on, when reaching the bottom of the escalator an identical correction had been made on a subsequent poster.
You could feel the annoyance of the scribbler and their palpable relief at doing something to stem the tide of the dumbing down of our language. Whoever you are, I tip my hat to you.
The fewer / less debate is one that seems to rumble on and on. Made infamous with the long running ‘10 items or less’ signs displayed in Tesco. In September the supermarket decided to change the signs, at which time a spokesperson foolishly said: "The debate about what is right has been going on for years now, and I still don’t think we know if ‘less’ or ‘fewer’ is correct".
So for the dictionary deprived Mr. Tesco, here’s a simple grammar lesson. Less refers to quantity and fewer to number.
Or put it another way, less is for uncountable nouns, fewer is for countable. Item being a countable noun should leave the Tesco spokesperson with no confusion which word to use.
To get a little more technical, if we are measuring something and it can only be expressed in whole numbers we use fewer. For example, I took fewer books from the library. If we are measuring something that is not always necessarily a whole integer, for example time which can be expressed as, say, five and a half weeks, we use less.
Now I am a believer that languages need to evolve, be flexible and that they get richer by embracing the influences of cultures and communities using them. English has a good track record of absorbing words from Greek, Latin, Hindi, German and Norse etc. However making a stand for grammar is not about halting progress but ensuring the language maintains the precision to communicate without ambiguity.
So for those about to re-write I salute you. It’s time to rise up and take a stand. Make the pledge that next time you see a park bench proclaiming ‘Gaz and Shaz was here’, you’ll take out a marker pen and correct it to be ‘were’. Together let’s make sure it’s the only language these people understand.
Tags: grammar
December 31, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Someone on Flickr shares your delight. There’s a new Flickr group called ‘Guerilla Grammar’ dedicated to the wordy wonders who prowl our mean streets righting grammatical wrongs, and your example is in there: http://www.flickr.com/groups/939585@N24/
March 29, 2009 at 10:02 pm
By the way… recently I have been tempted to put on a mask and whip out a permanent marker while riding the Bakerloo line. There is a Nivea ad on the tube that begins, “Who would of thought…”
Who would have thought a company so big could make a mistake so mortifying, and so public, and so semi-permanent?